Stop Letting “Office Politics” Keep You from the Big Job
- Erin Hatzikostas
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
Let’s talk about one of the top three things that quietly holds people back from saying yes to big roles:
“I’m just not good at office politics.”
And honestly? I get it. On the surface, office politics feel gross, exhausting, and wildly unfair. Most of us don’t want to play games—we want to do good work and be rewarded for it.
But here’s the reframe that changes everything:
Most of what we call office politics… isn’t politics at all.
It’s relationships.
The Cafeteria Story That Changed Everything
Early in my career—mid-to-late 20s—I joined the international division of a larger company. I was technically on the leadership team, except for one small detail: I was the only one without an office. #rules
Almost every day around lunchtime, I’d notice two people heading off together—the big boss and one of my peers. Just the two of them. Off to the cafeteria.
And I remember thinking:
“Well… that feels politicky.”
It took me years—years—to realize what was actually happening. I didn’t get it until I became the big boss myself.
They weren’t scheming.
They weren’t excluding.
They weren’t plotting my downfall.
They were friends.
And guess what? Even executives need someone to walk to lunch with.
That’s when it hit me: we assume ill intent way more often than reality warrants. And when we do that, we turn perfectly normal human behavior into a career-limiting story.
So let’s stop calling it office politics—and start calling it what it really is:
Office partnerships.
Tip #1: Assume Good Intent (This Solves 80% of the Problem)
I know. Your instinct is, “I’m not the problem—it’s everyone else.”
But hear me out.
Most of the time:
Someone got looped in because they’ve worked together longer
Someone got the meeting because they thought they were the go-to
Someone had the conversation because the relationship already existed
Not because they’re trying to sabotage you.
When you pause and ask, “What’s the most generous explanation for what I’m seeing?”—the emotional charge drops fast.
This mindset shift alone can remove about 80% of the stress people attribute to office politics.
That’s authenticity in the workplace in action: choosing curiosity over paranoia.
Tip #2: Be the Person Who Snuffs Out the Gossip
Okay, this one is hard. And yes, I still have to work at it too.
So many people complain about office politics… while simultaneously diving headfirst into gossip the second it shows up in Slack, IM, or a hallway whisper.
Here’s the truth you’ve known since middle school:
If people are talking with you about others, they’re definitely talking about you too.
Gossip is like a candle.
Without oxygen, it dies.
Stop feeding it.
Change the subject.
Don’t pile on.
Don’t “just listen.”
You are part of the culture whether you like it or not. When you snuff out gossip, other people feel uncomfortable continuing it—and over time, it fades.
That’s authentic leadership at a micro level.
Tip #3: Fight Fire with Friendliness
You’ll get the sharp email.
The passive-aggressive comment.
The meeting moment that feels… off.
Sometimes it’s real. Sometimes it’s perception. Either way, you still get to choose how you respond.
One of the most powerful moves you can make?
Change the tone.
I recently got a very “meh” email from an old partner. Nothing wrong with it—just cold. And instead of matching the energy, I replied with:
“Thank you so much. I really appreciate the heads-up.”
Tone shifted. Instantly.
You don’t have to play the game the way it’s handed to you. You get to shape the culture every single time you hit send.
That’s showing up as your authentic self at work—calm, confident, and intentional.
The Big Reframe
If you see everything as politics, you’ll avoid the game entirely.
If you see things as partnerships, you’ll start building influence naturally.
And influence—not politics—is what gets you the big job.
You don’t need to be sneaky.
You don’t need to be fake.
You don’t need to play dirty.
You need relationships.
You need trust.
You need to stop opting yourself out of rooms you actually belong in.
So yes, you can go for that big job.
Just stop playing politics and start playing the partnership game.
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Erin Hatzikostas is an internationally recognized leader on the impact of authenticity in the workplace. Learn more about her keynote speaking, workshops, and other authentic programs here.
